I heard this poem on NPR’s Tinsel Tales 3 and it was too good not to share. You can listen to that complete episode at NPR.com or visit BaxterBlack.com to see more of his poems and stories. Merry Christmas to you all.
What’s Christmas to a Cow
by Baxter Black
I know you’ve prob’ly asked yourself,
What’s Christmas to a Cow?
You’ve not! Well maybe, just perchance
I’ve got you thinkin’ now.
When we march out on Christmas morn
like nothin’s goin’ on,
Has Yuletide struck the night before
and disappeared by dawn?
Were plastic sleeves a’hangin’ up
around the calvin’ shed?
Did visions of molasses blocks
cavort inside her head?
And did she lake awake at night
tensed up, anticipating
Or, in excitement milk her bed
by accident, while waiting?
Do cows just pretend to be just cows,
devoid of all intrigues
But really lead a secret life
like women’s bowling leagues?
Did we just miss the mistletoe?
Did all the clues elude us?
Does she believe in Santa Clause
or just Santa Gertrudis?
And if we look, would we see sign of
reindeer in the pen?
Or would we just convince ourselves,
the goat got out again?
And after we’d all gone to bed,
would they join in a hymn
and sing that little manger song
they learned in Bethlehem?
I guess that it don’t matter much
if cows believe or not.
We’ll fork her out a flake ‘a hay
and head back in a trot
to celebrate our Christmas day
with all that we espoused
and when we say our dinner grace,
we’ll thank Him for the cows.
For the livelihood they give us
and the life we get to share.
But do cows have Christmas cheer?
Who knows, but just beware,
If you see chicken tracks among
the straw and drying chips,
you better check suspicious cows
for eggnog on their lips.